Bloody Nail and Tap in the Spleen


So, yesterday I posted about how I walked into a rusted iron sign post, today was no better either.

So I went to this cyber cafe to print some posters, and by some I mean 11 posters (and they are amaaaazing). The first mildly bad thing happened there. I opened the keyboard slider case thingy in the table and it slid across my finger near the nail, effectively slicing open my cuticle and the skin underneath it. It was bloody. A little.

Then, when I came back home after the second failed attempt to have the best Oreo shake in the Milky Way galaxy because the shop was closed, I had to use the washroom for some god forsaken reason. I was in my friend’s room and while walking into the washroom, I did not manage to stop walking on time and as a result walked into the tap. Which almost punctured my spleen. Because I did not stop on time. It really can’t get any worse in one day.

P.S. I was exaggerating about the spleen part.

P.P.S. I want Oreo shake.

What, did you walk into a pole?


I have not been having good days for some time now. My stars are not aligned in my favor, again. Not surprising though, I really am used to it now.

Let me tell you about the most recent thing that happened to me; we have been conducting workshops on stress and on communication, in various organisations. So a couple of days ago, we went to this hotel to conduct the workshop for the employees. In the evening, when we were leaving, I had to call one of my professors to speak to her. So everyone sat down and were waiting for the cab and I was dialing the number and walking. And then the phone started ringing and I kept walking. And then I walked into a sign board. Made of iron. Rusted iron. And then I turned around to look at my friends and nobody even realized what happened, so I went to them and told them I hit my head. They said they heard a noise and assumed something fell. It was me, of course. Then I turned around and spoke to my teacher. After which I realized my forehead was bleeding. So I now have a cut on my swollen forehead, and a swollen arm courtesy tetanus vaccination. Life is a jungle.

Passport Application Verification Process


I’ve got dreams. Everybody has some dreams they want to fulfill. You know, like owning a restaurant or becoming a world famous dancer or becoming a pop star or eating a quiche the size of Texas. I too have a dream *cue Tangled OST, “I’ve Got a Dream”. My dream is to go to Canada for my post graduations. And hopefully, if things work out for me, I want to settle there.

So, I have taken the first step towards fulfilling my dream of going to Canada- applying for a passport. I applied for it a month ago actually. And a few days ago I went for the verification process in the passport office. Now the thing is, our passport office workers have interesting ways of doing what they have been assigned to do. Don’t get me wrong, I am not trying to insult anybody here, all I am saying is that it is fascinating. The whole process is kinda fascinating. I will tell you why- here’s a counter to counter report of the conversation I had with them.

                                               My Passport Verification-a-logue

Counter A:

Official: Hello, sit down.

Me: Thank you.

O: Look straight into the camera please. Tuck your hair behind your ears, they need to be visible.

M: okay. *click*

*does some verification thingy on the computer.*

O: May I have your documents please? Thank you. So where will you be going with your passport?

M: Canada.

O: oh, why?

M: To study.

O: When will you go?

M: After my graduation.

O: where do you study now?

M: XYZ College, 2nd year.

O: What do you study?

M: Psychology.

O: why psychology? Why not any other subject?

M: Because I like psychology.

O: okay. When will your braces come off?

M: 6 months or so.

O: Great. Did anybody accompany you today?

M: well, my father came because even my brother is getting his verification done today and he is a minor.

O: I see. Okay you can go now. Look out for your name on the screen and go to the assigned counter.

Counter B:

Official #2: Document for address roof please.

M: Here, my voter id card.

O2: Hmm. You look better in this photograph than the current one here [passport documents, the one I got clicked in counter A]

M: *stare at her for a second* Thank you?

O2: So why did you cut your hair?

M: *stare at her incredulously for two seconds* Because I had dengue and I lost a lot of hair after that so I chopped it all off.

O2: I see. But don’t cut it again. Grow your hair this time. You look good in long hair.

M: okay? Thank you…

O2: you can go now. Wait for the next counter number.

 

So, I was waiting in the waiting room for my name to show up on the screen. I waited for 15 minutes and then the guy from counter A shows up and says-

O: not done yet?

M: *in my mind- you can see me sitting here, waiting. So what do you think?* Nope.

O: okay. *goes away. Only to come back 10 minutes later*

O: I see you’re still not done yet.

M: *in my mind- No shit, Sherlock.* Nope.

O: Go to the front desk, they will tell you where to go before your name shows up on the screen.

M: okay, thank you.

*Find out where to go, go to counter and wait for the guy before me to finish.*

Counter C

Official #3: So many mosquitoes here today. I totally killed 4 of them with my wallet. Someone has to tell the sweepers to clean this room properly today.

*continues to discuss mosquitoes with four other officials, who also cease their work to talk about mosquitoes for the next 15 minutes, I kid you not.*

O3: *to the guy before me, who also contributed to the mosquito talk* Okay, you can go now.

*proceeds to stare at me for a few seconds after I hand him my documents*

O3: Are you a Bengali?

M: *stare at him with open irritation: Yes.

O3: *smiles broadly* But you look like a Marwari!

M: *give an exhausted half smile*

O3: Okay, you can go then.

He did not even check a SINGLE document. Just flipped through the folder. I waited for FORTY minutes to answer if I am a Bengali or a Marwari.

And thus, 2 and a half excruciating hours later, all the documents were verified and I walked out like victorious warrior who just got his limbs amputated. Okay, I am grossly exaggerating, but whatever. I am just glad it is over.

Canada, HERE I COME! Right after I manage to graduate. 

The Fault With My Stars


Luck obviously does not appreciate my existence. I seem to have a series of unlucky happenings happening to me. Like this particular day was exceptionally bad. And lets not forget the toaster incident. And the entire streak of bad luck I was having with His Hotness.
So anyway, what happened today is, Mickey, my labrador puppy, peed in the tiny corridor that leads to my room. So after watching a movie on romedy now, I thought of going to my room to put my cell phone on charge. And since I was unaware of the pee, I stepped on it. And obviously I fell. But that is never enough, now is it? While falling, I banged my head into the wall and slammed my arm into the washing machine. So now I have a painful potato on my head, a throbbing arm, quite possibly a fractured wrist and a horribly aching ass. My stars hate me. Okay bye.

I Have Not Been Kidnapped, Murdered or Sold To Slavery!


The random female is back! I mean me. Long time no see! Probably because I have not been posting much. Or at all. Because I am lazy and am about to come up with about three excuses for not posting, none of which actually hindered my posting. Anyway, so since I have been AWOL, for reasons not mentioned, a lot has happened. I managed to pass my first year of college, for one! I actually managed to pass! Even though I studied for like, one day, I kid you not. But whatever, I am officially in second year. Which is also about to get over in about 5 months or so.

My not-a-relationship with Mexican Chocolate (remember him?) is going pretty well… I have passed the oh-my-god-i-just-know-you-like-my-friend-and-are-going-to-ask-her-out-soon-thus-you-are-alienating-me phase. It was not a pretty phase. I made sure we fought too much and cried like a corporation water supply tank. But it is over now, it is sunny with chance of kisses in NotARelationshipVille. I am happy now. At peace with my ass-biting insecurities that are now dormant.

As  far as college is concerned, it is not getting over fast enough. My selection exams are going on and I am going to fail each of my 7 papers because, I HAVE A PUPPY!!!! You read that right, I have a puppy! She is a Labrador, a black Labrador, named Mickey. She is two and a half months old and pees like there is no tomorrow. She pees 17 times a day, shits 4 times a day. She eats plastic, remote controls, slippers, shoes, tables, walls, leaves, clothes, bags, hair that is preferably attached to one’s scalp, bed sheets, books, newspapers and occasionally proper food. Her effed up diet is the reason I will fail all my papers because every time I decide to sit with my books, she decides that she must eat something inedible and I have to chase her around the house, body slam her and forcibly extract the remnants of what used to be peace from her mouth. Life is hectic at the moment. But I love her! And she loves to chew my hair and hand and clothes and shoes, so I will take the liberty of concluding that she loves me too.

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So anyway, I recently went to Delhi, Agra, Mathura and just touched Rajasthan during Christmas. I shopped looooads, for myself and friends, I saw historical monuments like Taj Mahal, Agra fort, Fatehpur Sikri and I ate dal makhni twice every single day. I gained weight, knowledge and clothes. I met my school friend in Delhi. We shopped, we ate, we drank (just a little bit), tried flavored shots (revolutionary stuff, I tell you!) and clicked so many pictures! And then we came back before new year. For new year I went  to a house party with my best friend, had fun, danced a little, blah blah blah. So, HAPPY NEW YEAR! What, I am only 15 days late… 😀

So, what did you guys do on Christmas and new year? Any new year resolutions? I refuse to make any since I never ever ever follow through anyway. Post the 5th of jan, all my resolutions are forgotten! So tell me about yours! And also tell me if you followed through last year’s resolutions… 😀

See you in some days!

p.s. thank you annamfranco, for following my blog recently! The notification I got in my mail informing me of the follow is what made me want to post again! So thank you! ^_^

Byee!

A Little About Me


I am blogging after a long time today. I don’t know why though. It’s not that I didn’t have time or didn’t have anything to blog about or even that I had forgotten about it. I just didn’t. However, today, after a long time, I felt the need to write. Probably because there are things that are bothering me. Things that I cannot talk about to my friends, because it may offend my other friends. Even if they don’t ever come to know about it, I don’t want to say things about the people I love that are not complimentary. This, however, is a new development in me. I have never thought about not talking about someone in a manner that is not in their best interests. If some friend of mine hurt me, or offended me, or irritated me, I would just go to another friend and talk about it. Complain about it, rather. Not necessarily bitching about the person, though. Today, I don’t want to do so. This however, doesn’t mean that I don’t bitch about anybody. I do, guilty as charged.

Anyway, going back to what I started with. So, there are things that bother me. Small things, petty things. I won’t go into specifications, though. There are just some things I don’t like. Call it childish, call it oversensitive, call it whatever. Call it a blue monkey, if you so please. But simple as daylight, I don’t like them.  So, I wanted to make a list of ten things that I do not like. I don’t know why. I just like making lists. It makes me happy. And today, I am very unhappy. So, my victims, I shall present to you the list, in no particular order.

Things I Don’t Like:

  1. I don’t like it when people don’t answer my texts. Thanks to technology, I can now see if the person has read my text or not. So, if they don’t answer it, I feel bad. It makes me feel like I am disturbing them and that they don’t want to speak to me. Or they are just not interested. And I don’t mean that one has to reply immediately. If you are busy, I understand! But hell, you’ve been online for 4 hours now, 9 different times! Reply to me! Also the fact that I don’t tell everything to anybody and don’t share my daily activities or anything of that sort with anyone, it feels worse, because the things that I do share, that I do text about, they are important to me. Your acknowledgement is important to me, your opinion is important to me. If I tell you what I had for lunch and you don’t reply, okay, no problem. But if I tell you that I baked a fancy cake for my best friend’s birthday, knowing that I am a clutz in the kitchen, I am expecting a reply! Even a smiley works!
  2. I don’t like pizza.
  3. I don’t like it when people don’t make an effort. If I make an effort to make you happy, I am expecting something back. If I am considering your feelings, your likes and dislikes, your opinions and thoughts, then I expect you to consider mine! I am not paving a smooth road for you so that you can glide along with me, without a care, without bothering to do anything for me! Do me a favor and don’t be so selfish and self- centered. Sometimes, make an effort to do something for me, even if you don’t want to do it, or even if you don’t like it. Make me feel a little important. Make me feel appreciated. I am doing a lot for you. And if you cannot do anything for me, at least appreciate what I do for you.
  4. I don’t like hot food.
  5. I don’t like it when people cancel last minute. Unless it is an emergency, don’t do it. Just don’t do it. I will understand till an extent. But if you tell me, that somebody called you to do something else that you didn’t want to say no to, like have lunch, then I am going to throw a crowbar at your face, and you will not complain about it.
  6. I don’t like animal prints.
  7. I don’t like being spoken to rudely. I don’t like being snapped at. I don’t like being cut off mid-sentence. I am not a rude person, I am generally not rude to anybody. So if I am not speaking to you like that, I do not appreciate being spoken to like that. And if you cut me off mid-sentence with some sort of offhand comment about how you don’t want to listen to it, it makes me feel unimportant. Like what I am saying is not worth your time. That I am not worth your time.
  8. I don’t like watching Bond movies, Indiana Jones movies and I don’t like metal.
  9. I don’t like being anybody’s secret. I hate it. I have been in a couple of relationships where the guy wouldn’t let me tell anybody about the fact that we were in a relationship. Not even my friends. But I quite obviously told my friends and that lead to a hell lot of arguments. When I was in those relationships, I was too young and stupid to understand exactly what was going on because the guy would give elaborate explanations of why we couldn’t tell anybody and why we should be together in secret and a whole lot of other bullshit. Later I learned that I wasn’t pretty enough for them to tell anyone about me. And no, I am not assuming this, I was told so. That hurt. And agreed that I am not one of the most beautiful people on earth, I can’t even pass off as pretty. But man, could you be more insensitive and rude? So these days, I hate it if anybody even proposes that we don’t tell someone or anyone. No matter what the reason. I may understand, I may agree,  but I will hate it every second of everyday. I may know that the reason in completely valid and has nothing to do with me, but I will still feel that maybe if I was pretty, if I was smarter, he wouldn’t mind telling anyone because it wouldn’t matter. Because he would feel lucky and proud to have me, like I would feel lucky and proud to have him.
  10. I never liked Swat Cats or Captain Planet.

So there. A list of things I dislike.

Anyway, on a different note, Durga Puja just passed. To those who don’t know, Durga Puja is a four day festival celebrating the Hindu goddess, Durga. Although only 4 days are celebrated, Six days are observed,  Mahalaya, Shashthi, Maha Saptami, Maha Ashtami, Maha Navami and Vijayadashami. People build pandals, decorative, artistic and creative pandals that house beautiful idols of the goddess. Here. Some pictures for you.

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Aren’t they beautiful? The saddest part is, these beautiful idols, these beautiful works of art, are submerged into water on Vijayadashami. If I made these, or even something half as beautiful, I sure as hell wouldn’t have the heart to let them disintegrate to mud!