I’m Trilingual! Almost.


My grandfather is worried about me.
If you didn’t know already, I’m from India. East India, to be precise. From the state West Bengal. I was born and mostly brought up in the capital of Bengal, Calcutta. My mother tongue is Bengali. But, I don’t know much about it. I can’t read it, I can’t write it (naturally), I can barely speak it. I can, however, understand what a person is saying, if I’m spoken to in Bengali. It’s shameful, really. I know. But in my defense, I was in another state when they started to teach us a third language (first being English and second being Hindi), so I learnt Sanskrit instead of Bengali and then when I got back to Calcutta, I just never got around to learn Bengali.
Now, my grandfather is worried that if a guy ever writes me a love letter in Bengali, how will I read it? I will not know what he has written in it. I won’t know whether he wrote that he loves me or that he thinks I’m an egotistic brat and there’s nothing appealing about me. Or if he wrote about eggplants. I’ll never know. If I ask somebody else to read and translate, it would not be personal and exclusive anymore.
Then my grandmom whacked him on the head with the newspaper, yelling about how he’s putting funny ideas in my head and how I’m too young to get a boyfriend anyway. My grandpa doesn’t agree, though.
I tried my best to explain to him that I won’t get involved with anybody who can’t write me a letter in English. It seems to have done the job for the time being.

My question is, how will I even get a boyfriend? One who writes love letters, at that. There’s a dearth of decent guys around me, as it is.

Oh, also, I noticed today that most of my blog readers are from India, USA and UK, in that order! And Philippines, Canada, Germany, Australia, Pakistan, Mexico, Malaysia, Kenya, Brazil, Kuwait etc, in that order. I was so happy to see that so many people from so many places tolerate the nonsense I spout ๐Ÿ˜€
So, thank you for reading! ^_^
You guys really make my day everyday!

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14 thoughts on “I’m Trilingual! Almost.

  1. Absolutely hilarious ๐Ÿ˜€
    And surprisingly, we’re ignorant-bong siblings!
    Same 1st language English, second being Hindi, and a bare minimal understanding of what is supposed to be our beautiful language ๐Ÿ˜€

    It’s weird when proper Bangalis question our situation, innit?

    • Thank you! ^_^
      And totally! People not only question it, they straight out laugh at my face when I try to speak Bengali! Some have even gone to the extent of insulting me left, right and center because I, being a bong, born and brought up in Calcutta, can’t speak it! ๐Ÿ˜›

      • I know! and the really annoying thing? They question our respect toward our culture, but ask them a few pointed questions about Bengali Literature or writers or history, and you’ll be lucky to get a blank stare in return. A knowledgeable Bong expressing disapproval (decently) is fine, but the hypocrites our state is cursed with, meh.

        I went through a fair bit of your blog yesternight. You can be ridiculously funny ๐Ÿ˜€
        A pleasure making your acquaintance!

      • Oh, the pleasure is all mine. Seriously. ๐Ÿ˜€ I mean, I got a new like! ๐Ÿ˜€ And ridiculously funny? Im flattered ^_^ Aaand, as far as the pointed questions are concerned, I wouldn’t know what to ask! ๐Ÿ˜›

      • Just say something involving Rabindranath Tagore or Bankim Chandra Chatterjee, and you won’t go far wrong with most people.

        You don’t have to know anything about them, but the names ๐Ÿ˜€

      • But what if I very smartly ask them about it and they rattle off 7 pages of facts about them that they learnt for their WB board exams? Tab toh mera chop! ๐Ÿ˜›

      • Pick your battles. Talk to those who seem to be idiots.
        And in case someone does give you 7 pages worth facts, hell, what better way of learning exists? ๐Ÿ˜€

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